The High-Achieving Expat Paradox: Success Abroad Doesn't Always Equal Happiness
In this insightful episode of Nomadic Diaries, host Doreen Cumberford sits down with Lucy Boland, a seasoned expat coach, marathon runner, and mother of two, to discuss the realities behind the polished exterior of expatriate life. Lucy shares her personal journey from Poland to the US, UK, Germany, Spain, and France, and back again, exploring themes of mental health, connection, confidence, and what it means to find home as a global nomad.
Key Topics & Highlights:
- Lucy’s Expat Journey:
Lucy recounts how a one-year stay in the US turned into a 20-year global adventure, finally repatriating to Poland with her family. She discusses the challenges and surprises of returning "home". - Run for Mental Health:
Lucy talks about her upcoming marathon in support of the charity CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably), underlining the importance of mental health awareness among expats and high-achievers. - The Hidden Struggles of Expats:
Despite enviable lives showcased on social media, expats often face isolation, difficulty finding genuine connections, struggles with identity, sleep, work-life balance, and unspoken mental health challenges. - Expectations and Vulnerability:
High-achieving expats may feel pressure to manage everything themselves, leading to a reluctance to seek help and increased disconnection from loved ones both locally and back home. - Building Authentic Connections:
Lucy offers practical advice for intentionally and strategically building a support network as an expat—whether through hobbies, spontaneous connections, or structured meetups—and shares touching personal anecdotes. - Confidence and Adaptation:
The expat journey can shake one’s confidence as cultural expectations shift. Lucy explains the need to recalibrate self-image and embrace a new way of being confident in unfamiliar settings. - Types of Expats & Their Unique Challenges:
Lucy identifies four expat archetypes—those preparing to move, first-timers in the honeymoon phase, repeat movers, and long-term nomads or repatriates. She encourages self-compassion and embracing the trade-offs of global living. - The Importance of Community:
Well-being and thriving abroad hinge on understanding and nurturing the right kind of social connections for individual needs, from deep friendships to activity-specific groups. - Holistic Coaching Approach:
Lucy describes her coaching framework, utilizing the "Wheel of Life" to address eight interconnected areas: career, family/friends, finances, hobbies/recreation, environment, personal development, health, and significant relationships.
Memorable Quotes
- “Once an expat, always an expat.” - Lucyna Boland
- “Living abroad is a trade-off. You will never truly ‘fit in’—and that’s okay.” – Lucyna Boland
- “Home is a decision; it is not a place.” Doreen Cumberford
- “We are holistic—one topic in our life touches all areas.” Doreen Cumberford
Connect with Lucyna Boland
- Website: lucinaboland.com
- LinkedIn: Lucy Boland on LinkedIn
- Facebook: Lucy Boland on Facebook
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